I was going to write up something clever about what a douchenozzle Paul Ryan is, but then I stumbled across this truly epic piece by Charles Pierce over at Esquire and decided there was no way I could one up it. 

Courtesy of Esquire

Speaker Paul Ryan, the zombie-eyed granny starver from the state of Wisconsin, has spent this week bidding farewell to Our Nation’s Capital, and taking both his prodigious ego, and parading the tattered remnants of his utterly undeserved reputation down the boulevards of Washington. To complete the metaphor, somebody should have walked behind him with the shovel and a bucket. Ever the charlatan’s charlatan, and in keeping with the spirit of the season, his prolonged valedictory was as full of shit as the Christmas goose.

It began on Tuesday, when we all paid for a six-part miniseries on the electric Twitter machine chronicling Ryan’s rise from his poor but humble origins as the scion of a family that got rich on government construction contracts, to his hardscrabble years when we all paid for his needs through the Social Security survivor’s benefits he received (you’re welcome again, bumblefck), to his career in politics, which latter episode contained this monumental fireworks display of unadulterated mendacity.

“As a kid from Janesville, Wisconsin, I never thought I’d work on Capitol Hill, let alone be a member of Congress. I feel very blessed to have had these opportunities to make a real, positive difference in the lives of so many Americans.”

Jesus H. Christ at a Friday night fish fry, is there no end to this man’s utter fraudulence?

As I said, nothing I could write was going to match this. 

Ryan was a colossal fraud from the word “Go,” yet somehow convinced his constituents and the Republicans in Congress that he was some economic genius despite all evidence to the contrary. 

Thankfully he never got to bring his incompetence to the White House as Mitt Romney’s VP. 

Though to be honest that was apparently only a temporary reprieve from GOP stupidity.